(Updated) From The Orchard's Daily Rind blog via Proper Discord:
"Wagner for Relaxation"
"You already have this product in stock, but we’ll be sending you a new copy with slightly different artwork. Can you promote it?"
4. "T
he best-selling singles of Gustav Mahler"
5."You’ve had this record in stock since it was released three years ago, but our company took over distribution of the label last week. Customers will want to know that, right?"
6.
"Demand is inversely proportional to price, so if we make it free, everybody will want it. Then we’ll really be in business."
"The current financial climate has caused us to rethink the amount of music that constitutes “Every Piece Of Classical Music You’ll Ever Need”. To this end, we have created this 100-track addendum entitled “All The Other Pieces Of Classical Music You’ll Ever Need”.
"People really like Pachelbel’s Canon, but they don’t like his other music. Clearly, the problem here has to do with cover art."
"Classical Music for Fishing"
"The cover of this bad compilation album looks a bit like the poster for that movie that isn’t the sequel to the Da Vinci Code."
